An Ode to Friendships: A Very Platonic Love Letter

Let’s be honest, everybody loves a love story. The big romantic gestures, the heated arguments, the total adoration and infatuation. With the intensity of the emotions that romantic love produces, is it any wonder that it’s at the center of nearly all the art/media that we consume?

However, at the risk of sounding like a kids tv presenter, I believe that the importance of friendship has been done a disservice in the arts, and I’m here to amend that.

Do you ever look at a mate and think, “Why (how) are we friends?”. In fact, there’s a good chance that some of the closest people in your life have very little in common with you – on the surface. But, friendship runs deeper than likes and interests, it’s a choice.

Being friends means choosing someone over and over. It means accepting flaws and quirks because of who the person is and who they can be. It means always finding your way back to each other, whatever path life takes you down.

I think the purity of platonic love is an overlooked marvel. It has nothing to do with how somebody looks or what they have to offer you, it’s just being drawn to who they are.

It’s no coincidence that Friends is arguably the most successful sitcom of all time. Despite the great dramatics of Ross and Rachel and Chandler and Monica, what pulls audiences back again and again is, you guessed it, the friendships. The genuine love and happiness radiates through the screen, the mundane and banal becoming hilarious and moving just by the friends coexisting. Whatever your take is on Friends’ comedy, there’s no denying that the depiction of platonic relationships was a seismic shift in our culture.

It’s near impossible to write some of this without making myself wince at the obviousness of the statements I’m making. But I think that’s just it; the importance of friendships and platonic love is so obvious that it’s not.

We remember all the great romances of history, yet not all the great friendships. But I think that the great friendships are the best love stories of them all.

My friends span across my bedroom walls in the same way that they span across my life. They give me guidance, kindness and patience, and bring me the same joy as a deep belly laugh.

A coffee and catch up or a long winter’s walk and chatter probably gives me as much serotonin as a pill (hyperbole disclaimer). Just because friendships aren’t always as exciting as relationships, does not mean that we should value the everyday any less. The stability that friendships bring to my life, and yours too, are the foundations for how we choose to live our lives.

So how do we make sure that you don’t forget this when you’re done reading?

Text your mate right now.
Tell them you love them, or you miss them, or you want to go for coffee or a pint.
Give them a ring and ask for a life update.
Drop by their place for a surprise visit.
Let them know how much they mean to you; you don’t even have to explicitly say it.

A true friend will be one of the most precious things you have in your life, right now and always; that’s not something to lose sight of. This was my great big soppy “I love you” to all the people I love…platonically.